Some months ago I noticed a new plant growing beside the cluster of plants by the patio outside of my office. I loved the leaves of this mystery plant and wondered what kind of plant it was.
Our Goldenrod
Then finally the plant grew golden yellow tops that look sort of like mini Christmas trees flocked in golden yellow. Now I was even more curious to know the identity of this plant.
And believe it or not, just days later, I got my answer. As I was reading the Houston, Texas newspaper, I spotted a picture with a couple of different types of plants.
The picture was in an article about gardening. Looking at the picture I was drawn to the plant in the background. “That looks like the plant growing by my patio!” I said to myself. I was excited! Underneath the picture the caption told me that the plant in the background was goldenrod.
Although I’m a big proponent of using positive words as much as possible, I know sometimes negative words are just as important.
Why do you think that is?
How did the term ‘Terrible Twos” come about? If you don’t know what I’m talking about, it regards children who are 2 years old. At that age children start to become somewhat independent. And they tend to do many things of which their parents and other adults disapprove.
When that occurs, they tell the child, emphatically, “No!” And the child hears “No!” over and over again as the days, weeks and months go by.
Those memories of hearing disapproval are embedded in the child’s mind where they most likely remain into their adulthood. For some people who unconsciously remember and feel the disapproval they heard as a child, I believe they crave approval. So they do the opposite of what they felt when adults told them “No!”
They become “Yes” people. Anytime someone asks them for a favor, they quickly reply “Yes” or something like “Sure, I’ll be happy to do that.” They answer without considering possible consequences or priorities. And it’s not unusual for them to constantly stay busy with organizations and other commitments they make as volunteers.
When they over commit themselves, who suffers?
Are they so exhausted that they’re never at their best?
And does their exhaustion cause them to snap at their loved ones?
Do they spend enough time with their family and close friends?
Or do they neglect their loved ones to win the approval of as many people as they can?
How many people do they disappoint or hurt when they finally realize that they can’t do something they promised?
Have you ever had someone break a promise they made to you?
How did you feel when that happened?
Who do you know that fits the description I’ve given of a “Yes” person?
Is it you? Or someone you know?
Here’s the lesson. These are lyrics from my song, ‘The One Who Says No.’
I commend you if you choose to think good thoughts. That’s what I usually do. But the reality is that sometimes it takes something besides positive thinking to get what you want.
Here’s my story to illustrate that point.
One day while on our usual morning walk in the park, Brian and I walked carefully down the narrow dirt path on a high slope that leads down to the wide paved main pathway below. Since Brian was talking, I didn’t interrupt to remind him that it’s best to walk as quickly as you can on those one lane dirt paths on the slope.
Why did I recommend that?
Because some of the bicyclists in the park ride very fast and with little or no regard for pedestrians. They appear behind you without warning. You don’t even know they’re behind you until they’re suddenly beside you.
When cold weather struck here in Houston, Texas, plunging temperatures down into the twenties for several days straight, it was a challenge for me to think positive thoughts. That happened several weeks ago.
Then, the following week, it happened again! And we didn’t even get snow! At least a rare sight of snow would have made those temperatures more bearable for me.
Now if you haven’t figured it out yet, I don’t like cold weather. I’ve spent most of my life in areas of Texas where it’s unusual to freeze for several days straight, especially with temperatures in the twenties. So perhaps I’m not quite as positive as I could be when it gets cold.
Was it because I wasn’t that positive that my computer started having problems? It was just reacting so slowly whenever I wanted to see a website or email. And forget about watching any videos! The videos never completely loaded…or maybe they would have if I waited for hours.
When I mentioned my computer problem to someone who spends a lot of time on a computer, he told me that the Internet slows down in cold weather. “So that’s it,” I thought. But the problem continued when the weather warmed up.
Since my husband knows more about computer stuff like that than I do, I called upon him for help. And of course, he did his best to help, but still my computer remained slow and ornery. So then he called our Internet service provider. The tech guy who answered his call said we might need a filter.
When Brian told me that, I asked him if we have a filter, and he said, “I think we do, but I don’t know where it is.” So I told him to ask himself where to find it.
